When my children were born I forgot to look after myself, I went into mummy mode and forgot how to look after me. If I’m honest I don’t think I ever knew I had to look after me. Everything I did was for them and it still is but you can lose yourself in the mean time. I thought this was the norm, your goals are forgotten once you have children but this is far from true and I believe this is why there are so many wife’s/mother’s who are not happy and feel like they don’t know themselves and may feel trapped and resentful to their partners.
Being a mother and wife has been the best experiences of my life hands down. My children are my world. However being a mother and wife can be difficult to juggle the things I want to do. And in the same time being responsible for my two children and my husband. My role to make sure everyone achieves what they want to do but at the same time trying to find out, what my dreams are and pursue them.
I think society, family/friends have made us think we need to sacrifice absolutely everything to be a mum! And to be 100% honest with you I have and always have. But this is far from the truth. I’ve now learnt that you have to take care of yourself first, what I do on a daily basis as a mother – making sure all my children’s needs are met, a wife – making sure my husbands goals and needs are being met, a women, blogger, content creator, advocate, and fighting for Jacob’s needs and supports for his Autism is work. I also have to be responsible for myself as if I’m not there becomes an imbalance and I will start living my life through my children which is so wrong.
I think as wife’s/mother’s we need to remember to take care of ourselves first because when we stop taking care of ourselves we also forget how to look after others and we lose our way on how to be happy so we blame our husband’s for our unhappiness. We are in charge of our happiness, it’s us as human beings to make ourselves happy.
I think what I’m saying is I’ve lived my whole life worrying if I was a good mum and trying to do everything myself and never asking for support or help. I would think putting myself first meant I was selfish, a selfish mum. Due to this I KNOW that my mental health has been jeopardised, my children’s happiness is jeopardised. So from this day forward I will put myself first, starting of daily with changing the way I think etc…
I have the most supportive husband in the world and Im so grateful, he’s been telling me for year’s to put myself first. Now is that time.
Do you put yourself first? How do you?